The Illusion of death

“Each day is a little life: every waking and rising a little birth, every fresh morning a little youth, every going to rest and sleep a little death.” – Arthur Schopenhauer

The first of life’s great illusions says death is the end of life. Seeing through this veil, you come to realize that a deeper understanding of death is required to truly understand life. Opposites of the same whole, death is life’s greatest teacher and life, death’s greatest friend.

Being told that my father had less than one year left to live broke me, for a time. Dad, barely 50, was my anchor and the glue that kept our family together. Four months crept by, feeling like years, as I helplessly watched my strong, funny, caring, charismatic father deteriorate to a shell of his former self. Mercifully, on March 11, 2006, Dad, while sleeping peacefully next to my sister Hollie, let go.

A day I look back on now as the worst and best day of my life. Best, because it opened my eyes to a fuller truth. While siting at my father’s funeral, numb with pain, it came. Out of the blue. Feeling it first in the back of my heart, energy tingled and sizzled through my body, filling it up. It was my father, but more, telling me everything was okay. Waking me up. I cried, tears finally streaming down my face. Yet I wasn’t strictly sad, feeling every emotion I’d ever felt, then more. Almost too much, but perfect, and at peace for an infinite moment. Was it Dad saying, “Good-bye?” No. More like a “Hello.” Our first spiritual greeting, consciously connecting us forever, pointing to a reality I had missed for so long. My father didn’t die. None of us do.

This understanding that we’re all connected, even after death, has allowed the fear of this mighty illusion to release its hold. Creating a new reality of infinite possibilities. One where I’m able to grant wishes to people in need and hopefully help you connect with your highest self in communications like this. Dad’s spirit leading the way.

A wishes fulfilled life

When granting wishes for a living you come to notice that most requests are as diverse as the personalities requesting them. Peace, health and happiness, super powers, unlimited abundance, money or a day with a lost loved one. All with this deepest of desires in common – A fully realized life.

Begging the question, what wish requests, if followed through, can help transcend death? Bronnie Ware, author of The Top Five Regrets of the Dying sat with dying men and women for 6 years as a palliative nurse and began to notice a trend with their final thoughts and regrets. Which, to me, reads more like our truest wish list:

  1. I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself
  2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard
  3. I wish I had the courage to express my feelings
  4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
  5. I wish I had let myself be happier

Externalizing our wishes by asking gods, genies, and magical leprechauns be the fulfillment entities will only leave the unfulfilled aftertaste of wanting. Instead, re-read the above wish regrets. Memorize them. Repeat them everyday until you begin building a day around them. Giving them life.

Looking deeper into our being, we begin to understand that to see through the illusion of death we must transform the regrets of the dying into the activities of the living (and your homework for today).

To transcend the illusion of death: LIVE

  1. Be true to yourself
  2. Don’t work so hard
  3. Express your feelings
  4. Hang out with friends
  5. Give yourself permission to be happy

Don’t waste your wishes on wishing anymore. No regrets. Today, do one thing that will help make a dream come true. Do it again tomorrow, then repeat. Listen to your heart for direction. If you don’t know what that is, ask yourself, what am I most passionate about? Take some time off work (if you can) and go visit a friend or family member you haven’t seen in a while. If you feel like you should say something, say it, no matter the consequence. And most of all, choose to be you.

Understand YOU – meditate

If you can’t remember who you are or feel lost, meditate every morning as soon as you wake up and evening before you go to sleep. Done with sufficient frequency, who you truly are will reveal itself. Resting in the still place between your breath. Between life and death. It took me years to cultivate this habit. Stick with it. Peace will follow. I promise.

Tomorrow we learn about the illusion of force. Be sure to meditate before you read it, OK?

With Love,


PS. A few months before my friend Dr Wayne Dyer passed, he introduced me to this mystically guided Sadhguru meditation in Ottawa. Wayne, myself and his daughter Skye practiced in his hotel room. And it was awesome. Check it out here

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